Morning adventures..

I'm always late.  I blame my father.  It MUST be genetic, because I really am responsible. I swear!  So why is it that the morning I am super duper late, my kid decides to be a little diva.  And by diva I mean...

First, she decides that she is NOT going to potty this morning because it's such a CHORE so she proceeds to run around the house in her diaper screaming "NOOOO DON'T WANNA POTTTTTYYYYY!!!!!.  DON'T DO THAT MOMMY!!"  So now I"m chasing a pissed off kid, hoping that she doesn't lose her bladder functions before I can wrestle her on the potty. 

Okay.  Potty is done.  Whew.  I"m already exhausted and have decided that I'm not really a fan of potty training... she can totally wear a diaper until she's five. 

NOW we have to get her dressed.  She's still naked at this point because she doesn't want to wear Dora underwear NOR does she want to wear a pullup.  Greeeeeeaaat..she's perfectly fine going to school without underpants, nice.  So now I have a completely naked toddler taking Addy's Last Stand over getting dressed for school.  FINE.  Let's do this, kid.

So I put on Mickey Mouse to distract her whilst I try to slip (wrestle) a T-shirt over her head.  I'm met with "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOS DON'T WANNNA WEAR DIS!!  WANNA PRINCESS DRESSS!!  NOOOOOSSS!!!!!" *insert smushy face sad cries and ninja arm blocks* 

....and she's off.  She's a pretty fast runner.  So NOW I'm REALLY late and chasing a completely naked toddler around and around and around our living room and kitchen, which I now realize is kinda roomy and could in fact double as an indoor track if I ever needed a good workout on a rainy day.  By this point she's laughing hysterically because isn't this fun??  Mommy chasing Addy is always her favorite game! 

Finally.  I catch the kid.  Plop her on the couch.  Explain to her that this T-Shirt is in fact a beautiful princess T-Shirt and she can even wear the beautiful princess pony tails too.  She seems to accept this.  I'm safe for now. 
But wait...now we actually have to GET IN THE CAR and GO to SCHOOL.  OMG. 

"NOOOOOS DON'T WANNA GO SCHOOL!!!  DON'T WANNA SEE FWENDS!!!  WAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!11!" 

...Aaaaaaaand we are off again.

Really.  How do you explain this to your boss?